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My Top Ten: Britney Spears Music Videos

27 Dec

Those who know me know of my borderline-unhealthy obsession with BritBrit, so I’m not quite sure how this blog has been active for so long without a Britney-centric post in its history. And while I hate to admit it, some of her videos have been…less than stellar. Among the all-time worst: Gimme More (tears were shed whilst watching this trainwreck), Break the Ice (anime?!), and I’m Not a Girl, Not Yet a Woman (R.I.P. Crossroads). But let’s focus on better days. Without further ado, my top ten Britney Spears music videos:

10. Womanizer (2008)

Why: This is Britney’s comeback from the Blackout head-shaving nightmare. She looks incred, and we revert to multiple-character Britney from the golden days of yore.

Most LOLtastic scene: Britney as a limo driver steering the wheel with her high-heeled foot before magically apparating to the backseat.

9. Do Somethin’ (2005)

Why: It is so horrendously bad that it’s good. Everyone involved in this song and video must have been drunk at the time of its creation.

Most LOLtastic scene:  The flying pink hummer.

8. Lucky (2000)

Why: Quintessential Britney before she entered her bad girl phase. It’s pop magic. And it’s also the innocent precursor to the much more disturbing Everytime, in which Britney basically kills herself due to her stardom. Lucky, beware.

Most LOLtastic scene: Britney 1.0 continually throwing glitter from her perch on a cardboard star onto Britney 2.0, a character whose name is actually Lucky.

7. Oops!…I Did It Again (2000)

Why: This video has more backstory than the unnecessary plotline to a porno. And it takes place on Mars, no less. Obviously. Also, the red leather catsuit. Halloween 2012, prepare.

Most LOLtastic scene: The spaceman brings martian Britney the necklace from Titanic. What?

6. Stronger (2000)

Why: The chair dancing and the superb eye makeup.

Most LOLtastic scene: The crimped strands of hair.

5. (You Drive Me) Crazy (1999)

Why: It’s before Britney videos became intricate storytelling devices and focuses on the choreography instead.

Most LOLtastic scene: Melissa Joan Hart, Adrian Grenier, and their awful associated movie.

4. Till the World Ends (2011)

Why: It’s an apocalyptic party in the sewers.

Most LOLtastic Scene: It’s an apocalyptic party in the sewers.

4a. And it’s also because I reserve a special place in my heart for this tune.

3. Toxic (2003)

Why: The costumes, namely the diamond-encrusted Britney.

Most LOLtastic scene: Britney riding on the back of Tyson Beckford’s motorcycle in a futuristic Paris.

2. …Baby One More Time (1998)

Why: Her first-ever, iconic music video.

Most LOLtastic scene: The overall innocence of a 16-year-old (!) Britney.

1. I’m a Slave 4 U (2001)

Why: Defining moment of her career and sexuality, the antithesis of …Baby One More Time. The choreography. Her abs.

Most LOLtastic scene: None. This video is perfection.



My Top Ten: Beatles Songs

20 Feb

10. “Octopus’s Garden” – One of Ringo’s two songs. Light-hearted. Lovely. Littoral.

9. “Come Together” – Absurd. Animated. Acid trip.

8. “You’ve Got to Hide Your Love Away” – Simple. Smart. Sexy.

7. “In My Life” – Passionate. Pensive. Pure.

6. “When I’m 64” – Merry. Melodic. Memorable.

5. “Something” – Harrison’s best. Romantic. Rousing. Real.

4. “Hey Jude” – Invigorating. Inspiring. Infectious.

3. “I’ve Just Seen a Face” – Bewitching. Beguiling. Breathtaking.

2. “Get Back” – Fun. Fast. Fantastic.

1. “A Day in the Life” – Complex. Crazed. Calming.

Honorable mentions: “Rocky Raccoon,” “It’s Only Love,” “Helter Skelter,” “If I Fell”

Least favorite Beatles song: “Revolution 9”

My Top Ten: Feel-Good Songs

11 Jan

Important life lesson: Do not put on depressing music when feeling sad. Instead, play* one of these joyous tunes:

*In most cases, you will have to follow a link to YouTube. Lame-o, but still worth it.

1. The Four Tops, “I Can’t Help Myself”

In and out my life
You come and you go
Leaving just your picture behind
And I kissed it a thousand times

2. The Beatles, “Ob-La-Di, Ob-La-Da”

Ob-la-di, ob-la-da, life goes on…

3. Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell, “Ain’t No Mountain High Enough”

If you need me, call me
No matter where you are, no matter how far
Just call my name, I’ll be there in a hurry
You don’t have to worry, ’cause baby,
There ain’t no mountain high enough

4. Rodrigo y Gabriela, “Diablo Rojo”

5. Coldplay, “Life in Technicolor ii”

Time came a-creepin’, oh, and time’s a loaded gun
Every road is a ray of light
It goes on, time only can lead you on
Still, it’s such a beautiful night

6. Guster, “Come Downstairs and Say Hello”

To tell you the truth, I’ve said it before
Tomorrow I start in a new direction
I know I’ve been half-asleep
I’m never doing that again

7. The Turtles, “Elenore”

Elenore, gee, I think you’re swell, a-haaa!

8. David Gray, “Please Forgive Me”

Please forgive me if I act a little strange
For I know not what I do,
Feels like lightning running through my veins
Every time I look at you

9. Regina Spektor, “On the Radio”

This is how it works
You’re young until you’re not
You love until you don’t
You try until you can’t
You laugh until you cry
You cry until you laugh
And everyone must breathe
Until their dying breath

10. John Denver, “Take Me Home, Country Roads”

Country roads, take me home
To the place I belong
West Virginia, Mountain Mama
Take me home, country roads



Everybody wants to love, everybody wants to be loved

17 Dec

Happy is the heart that still feels pain
Darkness drains and light will come again
Swing open your chest and let it in
Just let the love, love, love begin.


26 Oct

One of my  favorites to listen to on a rainy day or on a train ride. Seven minutes and 54 seconds well spent.

The Atlantic was born today and I’ll tell you how
The clouds above opened up and let it out

I was standing on the surface of a perforated sphere
When the water filled every hole
And thousands upon thousands made an ocean
Making islands where no island should go

Those people were overjoyed, they took to their boats
I thought it less like a lake and more like a moat
The rhythm of my footsteps crossing flatlands to your door have been silenced forever more
The distance is quite simply much too far for me to row
It seems farther than ever before

I need you so much closer…